I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
