There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
