He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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