she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
