We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
