you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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