how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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