Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
my sisters under your porch take her home
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
