Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
