they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Randomize
