Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i think i have herpe
just one?
the day after is always just damage control
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
