he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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