i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
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i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.