like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
If its not for food we ain't going out.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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