yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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