dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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