I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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