Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Houston, we have a blender
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Randomize
