You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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