He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
