He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
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One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
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Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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