isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i came on her dog
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
