I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
