wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
