Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
