and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
