Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bring money and cleavage
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
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