WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I can text with my tongue
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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