WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
