I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
