i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
