margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
