is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
