Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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