I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
