considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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