Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
