he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Randomize
