im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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