Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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