My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
