dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
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