You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Randomize
