Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
