is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize