it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Randomize
