what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Screwed.edu
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
