let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Randomize