All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
