wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize
